Swirlee (found short film; 1990)

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Makeup artist Kelly Gleason applying the Softee makeup to Lorinz.

Status: Found

Swirlee was a 15-minute short film directed by and starring James Lorinz (famous for his roles in exploitation films such as Street Trash and Frankenhooker).

Plot[edit | edit source]

It tells the story of Mr. Softee, a mutant hybrid with an ice cream cone for a head. He was a victim of the anti-miscarriage drug "Nodroppinum," which changed the pregnant mother's child into whatever food she craved at the time (a parody of the Thalidomide scandal from the 60's). Softee was the head of an ice cream company until he was forced out of business by the artificial ice cream mafia, led by Don Tofutti. Softee is a depressed man who just wants to be accepted and at one point, attempts to commit suicide by dissolving in a warm bath.

Genesis[edit | edit source]

Lorinz first thought of the idea in film school. In 1989, after securing funds from a television appearance, he filmed a 15-minute test film to attract potential investors for a feature-length version. The film was written by Rocco Simonelli,[1] produced by Roy Frumkes, and co-starred Street Trash's Tony Darrow as Don Tofutti and a then-unknown David Caruso as Softee's roommate.

Despite the intention to present it as a gritty Mean Streets style drama, studios would only accept the film if it was retooled as a lighthearted comedy for children. Eventually, the project was abandoned.

Status[edit | edit source]

Recently, the full version of the short (albeit in low quality) was found and uploaded by youtube user "artdamaged" and noticed by LMW user "unclesporkums" It was also cleaned up and Reuploaded by "Notelu"

Cleaned up version of the short.
The full short.
Full Remaster by Notelu.

Resurfaced Trailer[edit | edit source]

The trailer for the short.

References[edit | edit source]

  1. The film's script. Retrieved 16 May '13.