Monty Python Sketches (partially lost deleted scenes from TV and movies; 1973-1975)

A rare behind-the-scenes photo of the sketch, "Flute Player".

Status: Partially Lost

Monty Python's Flying Circus was an avant-garde TV comedy programme aired from 1969-1974 on the BBC in England, conceived, written and performed by 5 British scholars and one American animator, all of whom happened to be naturally gifted comedians: Graham Chapman, John Cleese, Eric Idle, Michael Palin, Terry Jones and Terry Gilliam. The show was an immediate hit and the sextet, despite eventually splitting off to pursue solo projects, would forever after become known collectively as Monty Python.

By an extraordinary stroke of luck, the original run of the Flying Circus survived entirely intact through the BBC's policy of wiping/reusing master tapes to save money (victims of which famously include Doctor Who and Not Only...But Also); Terry Jones was tipped off that a wipe was scheduled and the troupe was able to smuggle out the master tapes to make copies. Over the many years and multiple re-edits since, however, various scenes from the show and associated media exist only in fragments if at all.

Flying Circus Sketches (1973-1974)

The most famous of the cut sketches by far is the Undertaker sketch, which was intended to close out Series 2 at the end of the twenty-sixth episode overall. This was a very obvious assault on the bounds of good taste revolving around the Victorian title character (Chapman) and his assistant Fred (Eric Idle) persuading Cleese's uptight, properly mourning son to eat his mother's body rather than deal with (what the undertaker claims is) the unpleasantly messy hassle of burial or cremation. Cleese is persuaded once they dig a grave for him to throw up into in case he feels "a bit guilty afterwards", and the sketch... proceeds from there, much to the vocal disgust of the studio audience - who had been brought in on the gag with the incentive of meeting the Pythons afterward. Finally they rush the stage in protest, upon which everyone freezes amid the solemn strains of 'God Save the Queen'.

It's honestly incredible that the same BBC censors who would elsewhere nix mere references to cancer agreed to allow this full sketch to be taped, but they did - conditional, they warned the troupe, on the audience being very convincingly horrified indeed. Unfortunately - or not - in the event the audience started booing and heckling too early, and ultimately came across as far more entertained than shocked. Security regs allowed only a few people to actually rush the stage, leaving the rest looking distinctly awkward. After its initial broadcast in 1970 the BBC executives - no doubt facepalming mightily at their own naiivety - went so far as to wipe it off the master tape and dub in a sketch of roughly the same length from earlier in the series.

They seem to have relented eventually, however, as a low-quality but complete recording of the sketch from an unknown source (thought to be an off-air dub for someone's personal viewing) was sourced in time for the episode to be restored for the second series' release on BBC Video in 1985, and the intact episode was subsequently seen in American PBS reruns.

Three sketches were removed from the Series 3 episode "E. Henry Thripshaw's Disease", the 36th out of 45 overall:

Half-A-Bee! Two beekeepers argue over who caught a bee... having both accidentally netted Graham Chapman, who grows increasingly annoyed. The oblivious keepers begin to debate whether his name is Mick or Daryl, then bring in King Solomon (inexplicably attended by a couple of Pharisees) to rule on who takes him. This of course ends with the king ruling that the 'bee' must be cut in half, and a chipper, genre-hopping song follows as a priest and executioner do just that.

The sketch was one of a few that got cut in various stages of production due to Chapman, a self-admitted alcoholic, frankly being very drunk and thus unable to remember his lines.

Big Nosed Sculpture: John Cleese portrays a mayor who commissions a bust of himself, only to correct an elongated nose carved on it when the sculptor is too emotional to correct it himself.

Chapman again starred in this sketch, and again his inability to remember his lines got it cut.

Revolting Cocktails is an odd one wherein three jovial 'city gents' request increasingly disgusting drinks at a rural bar, all happily supplied by the cheery bartender - who is heavily implied to be having one over on the cluelessly slumming gents. Each cocktail involves live animal mutilation, and subsequently a considerable amount of vomiting.

No official reason has been given for its removal, but like the "Undertaker" sketch it seems to have been solely intended to test the boundaries of televised bad taste and was likely cut in a much more timely manner by executives that had learned their lesson in the interim.

Ursula Hitler' was slated to be the last-ever original Python sketch to be broadcast, having been designed as the finale of episode 45, but was removed shortly prior to airing. It revolves around respectable British spinster Ursula Hitler, nee Lloyd-George, who had changed her surname numerous times in an effort to avoid the hassle of being named after Prime Ministers before finally settling on Hitler in 1934. This naturally caused some confusion in the mails, and Ms. Hitler (Chapman) explains to an interviewer (Terry Jones) how she accordingly threw out an odd letter ordering her to withdraw her troops from Poland or she would be in a state of war with Britain. She goes on to complain of the disruption that the subsequent war had caused, and reveals her 'revolutionary method' was to 'mark each of them with a red mark and drop them into the pool'... apparently she's talking about salmon farming. The interview concludes with the presenter accidentally shooting himself.

Again, it is unknown exactly why this sketch was cut, but according to various Pythons in interviews it seems official objections were raised to the handling of the sensitive subject matter, and as it was already overlong none of the troupe much minded it being removed altogether. The sketch was deemed "impossible to find" until it was recovered on the 50th anniversary reissue in 2019.

Monty Python's Fliegender Zirkus

The series proved so wildly popular in West Germany that as early as 1972 the Pythons were invited to tape 2 45-minute specials exclusively for Bavarian television. The troupe members all read phonetically from translated scripts, making this dub of the Flying Circus an especially interesting curiosity as the earliest alt-versions of the classic sketches involved. Unfortunately the specials have themselves become obscure, and has had its share of alternative foreign versions. Four segments are completely missing:

• A version of the "Marriage Guidance Counsellor" sketch.
• A sketch involving a flute player (Chapman) in front of a German sign.
• A version of the "Sir Edward Ross" sketch
• An alternate ending to the first special, in which two stage hands are carrying a giant sign that says ENDE off a huge field. Behind the sign is Terry Jones' singer character from the "Albrecht Dürer" sketch.

Two scenes are known to have been cut entirely; "Swimming Lessons with Arthus Lustgarten" and "Menthol Cigarettes Ad". Both would later resurface on YouTube.

Censorship

Many of the Flying Circus episodes, understandably, were subject to censorship. These sketches were not deleted entirely, but fixed to the best of the troupe's ability. In some cases, re-airings dealt with the issue; famed interviewer David Frost had his actual phone number published in one episode, which was hastily replaced by a fake one in rebroadcast due to his line being spammed. Some elements have simply required removal due to changing mores - various incidences of blackface have been cut for modern streaming - and expired song rights (Girl From Ipanema, Tonight).

Other material was muted. The "Summarize Proust" sketch removed the word 'masturbating' and another sketch had to redub over "what a silly bunt" as the star of the sketch was a man who pronounces 'B's as, erm, 'C's. 'Cancer' was removed twice on the grounds of bad taste, most memorably from Carol Cleveland's narration of a cartoon in the sixth episode, wherein a male voice is dubbed over saying "gangrene". The second and much less dramatic muting happened during the "Conquistador Coffee Campaign" in the eleventh episode... which, as the troupe is never tired of pointing out, still left a reference to leprosy intact.

A few unfixable sketches werre deleted, some of which have been rediscovered. The "Party Political Broadcast (Choreographed)" was axed as too obviously supporting the Labour Party ahead of an upcoming election (the BBC, as the de facto state broadcaster, is bound by very strict impartiality rules) but later resurfaced on American PBS recordings that were subsequently uploaded to YouTube and ended up as extras on later official Python DVD setc. A black/white 16mm reel among a collection in America preserved "Satan", the only animation to be deleted (for obvious reasons). As it happens the 'Conquistador Coffee' sketch fell just before this, so the reel preserves the unedited ' cancer' reference as well.

The films

Among Michael Palin's personal archives are long-lost tapes containing alternate and deleted sequences from the troupe's first and arguably most famous feature film, Monty Python and the Holy Grail. These included a much more "conventional" ending to the film (which was eventually scrapped in favour of the familiar abrupt cut to nowhere), Shakespeare's Hamlet as a "foul-mouthed private detective", a "Pink Knight" scene involving a bridge-guarding knight striking a "camp pose" and informing King Arthur that "None shall cross this bridge unless they give a kiss", and a "Wild West" scene wherein a news reporter enters a saloon (actually the "last bookshop befoe you go to Mexico") and asks for a beer, getting the response, "Not since they started specializing in European authors".

All of these are included in the materials Palin donated to the British Library, where they are readily available. As yet they have not surfaced elsewhere.

Video

The two cut sketches from the 1972 German specials: Swimming Lessons with Arthur Lustgarten and Menthol Cigarettes.

External Sites

• Fliegender Zirkus Sketch (Rare)
• from Holy Grail episode cut scenes